Bridging Two Worlds: The Journey of Embracing Multiracial Identity

Photo by Adventure Time Loui.

Have you ever felt caught between cultures, searching for a deeper connection?

For many of us, identity is shaped by family, history and traditions handed down over generations. If you identify as multiracial, that often involves straddling two or more cultures — and not every “mixed” kid gets that chance.

Multiracial kids’ exposure to their heritage depends on parents and caregivers who are navigating their own complicated, messy relationships with identity. It’s not easy, but the journey of self-discovery can be beautifully enriching. 

Loui, 27, is a multiracial content creator, traveler and adventurer based in Alaska. She currently travels in her Jeep Black Panther with her pit bull William. As someone who is half Filipino, a quarter African-American, and a quarter white, she understands this experience intimately. 

Loui’s nomadic lifestyle began in college, but the seeds were planted long before. Growing up in California, her family moved frequently, instilling a sense of adaptability and a yearning for excitement and change. Traveling to new places feels natural. 

Photo by Adventure Time Loui.

She ditched apartment living for a more nomadic lifestyle during her final year of college in Oakland, California. Faced with steep rent prices and cramped living conditions, Loui bought and renovated her first van. She worked various jobs to save money before fully embracing life on the road, exploring the U.S. and Canada. For Loui, vanlife was about financial freedom and experiencing the world firsthand. 

Expanding horizons beyond the U.S.

While van life provided a sense of freedom and adventure, she also wanted to learn more about her Filipino heritage. Loui remembers a time when she did not feel accepted by the white kids in school because her hair was long, frizzy, and big. Her skin was darker and her ethnic features stood out from her classmates. 

Growing up, she felt more connected to her African-American heritage; her Filipino heritage was pushed to the background. As an adult, her curiosity led her to Southeast Asia to gain an understanding of the culture she didn’t know much about. Visiting the Philippines wasn’t just a trip—it was a homecoming. For Loui, exploring the country brought a profound sense of connection and understanding. 

“Seeing the culture firsthand, hearing the language spoken and learning the history from people who’ve lived it their whole lives was incredibly grounding,” said Loui. Her trip highlighted some of the differences between the Filipino-American experience and life in the Philippines. It felt liberating and authentic, providing her with a new perspective to compare with life at home. 

The Philippines is made up of over 7,600 islands, 110+ indigenous groups and 120+ languages. It has a rich cultural diversity despite centuries of colonization and violence under Spain, the U.S. and Japan.

Loui found herself traveling up and down the island chain. She felt a connection to the lands and although this trip wouldn't lead her to family members, it provided a deep understanding into her identity as a mixed Filipino-American.

One of her favorite places to visit was the popular tourist destination, Siargao. It’s a small island off the northern coast of Mindanao in the southern Philippines, known for white sandy beaches and international surfing competitions.

 As Loui rode her moped along the route on the island of Siargao, the tropical breeze blew through her brown curly hair. She felt the warmth of the sun on her melanated skin while taking in the scenery along the coast. 

She recalled one particular experience on a beach in Siargao. A local woman walked up to her and gave her a bracelet. They started a conversation and when Loui mentioned she was part Filipino, the lady smiled and said, “I could tell.”  She invited Loui to spend the rest of the day with her friends and family. Moments like this made her feel connected.

Loui felt emotional and slightly overwhelmed in the beginning of the trip thinking of her family who worried about her safety and felt apprehensive about her trip. As she spent more time in the cities and showed them the country was different than when they lived there they began to praise her decision. When she met local residents  they’d show her around leaving behind a feeling of warmth and familiarity. 

The community was welcoming, offering a blanket of safety, comfort, and compassion. From walking the jungle canopies to surfing on the island Siargao, Loui immersed herself in the country fully. She ate the foods her father and grandmother made for her when she was younger and even learned to make what is now one of her favorite dishes, Filipino ceviche. She enjoyed moped rides to different communities where she learned the history of the country from both Indigenous  and tourist perspectives. She felt seen in a way which was different from the United States, she wasn’t categorized as the black or mixed girl and the feeling of not being placed in a box was liberating. 

Complexities of Cultural Roots

Photo by Adventure Time Loui.

Loui’s experience of multiracial identity has been both rewarding and challenging. She feels it’s awesome to be part of multiple cultures because she can fit into different spaces and communities, however, this fluidity also brings a sense of not fully belonging anywhere. “Sometimes, I feel like an intruder,” Loui admits. “I wonder if I really belong in African-American spaces, Filipino spaces, or white spaces because I’m not fully any one of them.” This is an internal struggle familiar to many multiracial individuals—a balance between pride in one’s diverse heritage and the search for a cohesive sense of identity.

When the family spoke of the Philippines it was mainly about how dangerous the country was. They were in the country during a time when the Philippines was under the rule of Ferdinand Marcos, an authoritarian and unjust ruler. Marcos, elected in 1965, was accused of assassination of political opponents. The governmental corruption, classism, and fast growth of communism led to an uprising where many civilian lives were lost. In 1972, Marcos implemented martial law in the country, claiming he was creating a “New Society.”(Boell) This led to more brutal times for the Filipino people, many migrating to other countries including the United States looking for a better life.

Loui didn’t spend much time with her grandparents as a child. She remembers not seeing them very often because they lived in a different state from her. She still smells the aroma of the traditional food staples like adobo, pancit, and lumpia coming from the kitchen. Her (lola) grandmother grew up on the island of Samar in Southern Philippines until being sold into marriage. They moved to Manila, where her father was born. They lived there until he was around thirteen when the family migrated to the United States. Once in the U.S. Loui’s father felt the pressures of being an immigrant. He was often bullied and decided to teach himself better English to fit into society.

Loui visited more often and recalls sitting with her lola listening to stories of her life in the Philippines. Communication between them was difficult  because her grandmother spoke multiple languages — including Tagalog and Cebuano but very little English. 

Visiting the Philippines for the first time offered Loui clarity and healing. She has been able to forgive her family for not passing down more of their cultural experiences. It gave her insight into why they wanted to assimilate into white American society. One of the most powerful aspects of her journey has been reconnecting with Filipino heritage.

Loui’s time in the Philippines revealed the country’s incredible diversity. With over 120 different languages and distinct cultural practices spread across the islands, the richness of its heritage was unmistakable. As she met people who had spent their entire lives in the Philippines, they shared their experiences and offered her valuable insight. This deepened her understanding of the country’s complex history and political landscape.

One of the most striking lessons Loui learned was the resilience and forgiveness of the Filipino people, even in the face of a brutal past. The Philippine-American War of 1899 left scars, with U.S. forces implementing concentration camps and burning villages in their efforts to annex the country (Britannica). Yet despite this painful history and centuries of colonization by Spain, Japan, and the United States, the spirit of the Filipino people remained strong.

As older generations began migrating to the United States, they often felt pressure to assimilate, learning American customs and language in hopes of fitting in but were still met with discrimination and economic hardships. They began to create their own communities, such as Little Manila in Stockton, California. These communities provided essential support and a sense of identity, helping immigrants navigate the challenges of belonging while preserving their cultural heritage.

Looking Ahead and Advice to Others

Photo by Adventure Time Loui.

Returning to the U.S. after such an immersive experience has brought mixed emotions. “I already miss the Philippines,” Loui confessed. Reflecting, Loui has recognized the importance of embracing her whole identity saying, “If you’re multiracial and trying to connect with your culture, just accept yourself fully,” she continued, “I am fully Filipino, and I am fully African American—both parts make me who I am.” She advises that if you decide to visit your ancestral lands to allow yourself to fully be a part of it without guilt. Learn and experience as much as possible.

Loui’s journey of embracing a multiracial identity and exploring her cultural roots is far from over. Her plans to return to the Philippines are already taking shape. Loui plans to bring her mother and brother with her next time. She wants to visit the island again and reconnect more deeply by looking for family members. In the meantime, Loui remains committed to learning more about Filipino culture—whether through language, food, or history. She doesn’t want to lose this beautiful part of her identity, and believes passing down traditions and knowledge is so important for future generations.

The journey of being multiracial is one of balance—navigating between cultures, embracing diversity, and finding unity in complexity. For Loui, it was also a journey of courage, curiosity, and connection. By fully embracing the different parts of herself , Loui also inspires others to explore their own multifaceted heritage. Her gained knowledge of her ancestors' past have given her a path to ending generational trauma and allow healing to begin. 

What parts of your heritage have you yet to explore? Do you feel it is worth leaving it all behind to find out more about your ancestry? Take the steps toward discovering your roots—whether through travel, food, language, or family stories. Embrace the journey of knowing your whole self. You can find Loui on social media as she shares her experiences on Instagram and her YouTube channel, Adventure Time Loui.

References

The Editors of Encyclopedia Britannica. (1998, July 20). Philippine-American War | Facts, history, & Significance. Encyclopedia Britannica. https://www.britannica.com/event/Philippine-American-War

On Martial Law at 50: Fact-Checking the Marcos Story, Countering the EDSA History Heinrich Böll Foundation | Southeast Asia. (2022, September 23). Heinrich Böll Foundation | Southeast Asia. https://th.boell.org/en/2022/09/23/martial-law-50